German at the doctor

Right now: three sentences for when you walk in

ShortcutYou can say you are in pain in two ways: with a noun — Ich habe Kopfschmerzen — or with a verb — Mir tut der Kopf weh. On the verb route the person is in the dative: mir, ihm, meiner Mutter.

The first person you speak to at the practice is not the doctor but the person at reception. They ask for three things: your name, your date of birth and die Versichertenkarte — your insurance card. If you hold out the card before they ask, half of the conversation is already over.

• Guten Tag, ich habe einen Termin um zehn Uhr. Hello, I have an appointment at ten. IF YOU HAVE AN APPOINTMENT · FIRST SENTENCE
• Ich habe keinen Termin, aber ich habe starke Schmerzen. I don’t have an appointment, but I’m in severe pain. IF YOU WALKED IN WITHOUT ONE
• Ich bin zum ersten Mal hier. It’s my first time here. NEW PATIENT · THEY WILL ASK

When you book by phone the pattern is always the same: Guten Tag, mein Name ist … Ich hätte gern einen Termin. The first question back is almost always Worum geht es denn? — “What is it about?” Keep your answer to one sentence: Ich habe seit einer Woche Rückenschmerzen.

On the phone people talk fast and cut in. Memorise two sentences and you are fine: Können Sie das bitte langsamer sagen? and Können Sie das bitte wiederholen? Confirm before you hang up: Also am Dienstag um neun Uhr zwanzig, richtig?

You already do this in English

In English, it is not you that hurts — it is the body part. You say “my head hurts”, not “I hurt my head”. German does exactly the same thing with weh tun: the body part is the subject, and you stand at the side as a dative.

The same logic works for the other ways of feeling ill. Just as English says “I feel sick” but German treats it like something happening to you, German puts the person in the dative with mir:

• Mir ist schlecht. I feel sick. NAUSEA · FEELING LIKE VOMITING
• Mir ist schwindelig. I feel dizzy. DIZZINESS
• Mir ist kalt / heiß. I’m cold / I’m hot (feverish). CHILLS · HOT FLUSHES

Careful: Ich bin heiß does not mean “I have a fever” or “I’m hot” as in warm — people understand something completely different. Physical feelings are always built with mir ist ….

Where, since when, what kind

The doctor does not want a story. They want three pieces of information, and once you give them the examination gets on track: wo — where, seit wann — since when, wie — what kind of pain.

Since when: you say it with seit and the present tense — because the pain is still going on, German does not use a past tense here. (English uses “I have had … for three days”; German simply says “I have … since three days”.)

• seit heute Morgen — since this morning
• seit gestern — since yesterday
• seit drei Tagen — for three days (dative plural: Tagen)
• seit einer Woche — for a week
• seit ungefähr zwei Monaten — for about two months

What kind of pain: this is what the doctor really wants to know, because the diagnosis often comes from the kind of pain. Five adjectives are enough:

What the doctor will ask — and reflexive verbs

The questions in an examination are almost fixed. Once you have read the list, what you hear in the room stops being a surprise.

Most of the verbs in this room are reflexive. English often leaves the “myself” out (“I caught a cold”, “I hurt my knee”), but German says it out loud with a separate word — mich, sich.

Two places where people go wrong

One more small distinction: Ich bin krank and Ich habe mich krankgemeldet are not the same thing. The first is a state, the second is an official notification to your employer. Simply telling your boss “I’m ill” is not enough; you have to report it.

The part nobody tells you: Hausarzt first, then Facharzt

The reflex many people bring from home is: knee hurts, go to the orthopaedist; stomach hurts, go to the internist. In Germany the system runs through one door, and that door is called der Hausarzt — your family doctor.

• Hausarzt = first stop. Your file is kept there, they write the referrals, they issue the sick note.
• Facharzt = specialist: Orthopäde · Hautarzt · HNO (ear-nose-throat) · Neurologe · Kardiologe.
• Legally you can go straight to a specialist — but the practice will ask its first question on the phone: Haben Sie eine Überweisung?
• A Überweisung and the appointment queue are different things; if your Hausarzt’s note says “this case cannot wait”, you may get an earlier slot.
• The ones people usually go to directly: Zahnarzt · Augenarzt · Frauenarzt · Kinderarzt.

There is an upside for you too: your Hausarzt is the only person who knows your file. When your German is not enough, this is the person who will help you most, because they know you and do not rush. So one of the first things to do after moving to Germany is: find a Hausarzt and register — before you get ill.

• Ich suche einen Hausarzt. Nehmen Sie neue Patienten auf? I’m looking for a family doctor. Are you taking new patients? FIRST SENTENCE WHEN REGISTERING
• Ich brauche eine Überweisung zum Orthopäden. I need a referral to the orthopaedist. ZUM + SPECIALIST · DATIVE
• Können Sie mir einen Facharzt empfehlen? Can you recommend a specialist? IF YOU DON’T KNOW WHICH ONE TO SEE

The second thing nobody says: who to go to, and when. In Germany the emergency room really is for emergencies; if you need a doctor in the evening or at the weekend there is a separate line.

A small detail, but it surprises people: the person at reception is not a nurse; the job is called MFA — Medizinische Fachangestellte. Calling them Schwester is an outdated habit; Entschuldigung … or Frau … with their surname is right everywhere.

Which paper on the way out: Überweisung · Rezept · Krankschreibung

The examination is over, and the doctor hands you something — or doesn’t. Asking for the right word is your job here — if you don’t ask, some papers won’t appear on their own.

• die Überweisung referral — from your Hausarzt to a specialist ASK: BRAUCHE EINE ÜBERWEISUNG ZUM …
• das Rezept prescription — for medicine, goes to the pharmacy TODAY MOSTLY E-REZEPT · LOADED ONTO YOUR CARD
• die Krankschreibung (AU) sick note — for your employer ASK: BRAUCHE EINE KRANKSCHREIBUNG

At the pharmacy the conversation is short: Ich möchte dieses Rezept einlösen. — “I’d like to redeem this prescription.” If the prescription is loaded onto your card, it gets even shorter: Ich habe ein E-Rezept. and you hand over the card.

Two more useful questions at the pharmacy: Haben Sie etwas gegen Husten? — “Do you have something for a cough?” and Wie oft muss ich das nehmen? — “How often do I have to take this?” The answer will probably come in this pattern: Dreimal täglich eine Tablette, nach dem Essen.

What to do this week

You need doctor sentences not in an exam but at the door — so you build a reflex rather than memorise. Five minutes a day:

• Write your own “three minutes”: Ich habe seit … Schmerzen im/in der … Der Schmerz ist … Fill the three gaps with your own situation and read it aloud.
• Build the same complaint in two ways: once Ich habe …schmerzen, once Mir tut … weh. Check that you put the dative pronoun in correctly.
• Pick five body parts and write one sentence for each — notice that with plurals the verb becomes tun: Mir tun die Augen weh.
• Phone rehearsal: Guten Tag, mein Name ist … Ich hätte gern einen Termin. — Worum geht es? — Ich habe seit … Say this dialogue out loud three times.
• Pick up a medicine box at home and translate the text on it. Write down three words you don’t know — the same words will turn up on the next box.

The next step is Dative verbs: weh tun is not alone — helfen · gefallen · passen · schmecken work on the same logic. For the moments when you get stuck while speaking, there are the right ways to say “I didn’t understand”.